I have 34 days left until my life changing breast reduction procedure! As I continue to prepare for a new way of life, I am checking off all the last minute preparations required to be ready for the big day.
Today’s preparation was probably the hardest, and the one I was most reluctant about. Today, I had to traumatize my children with a video of a surgical breast reduction.
They have been asking me question after question about how my breasts will get smaller and what surgery entails. I found this all nearly impossible to properly explain to them. They have never really wrapped their heads around doctors and surgeries. I found a short video on YouTube, albeit gruesome (the surgery is pretty gnarly) to give them the detailed answers they have been asking me for.
Now, they both elected to cover their eyes through a good portion of the 9 minute video.
Junah said, “Why are you making me watch this? It looks like they are murdering this woman!”
Kimbel said, “I think I’m going to have nightmares now.”
The point was not to traumatize them. I promise. Although, I did mention this was a good video for the month of October with Halloween coming. LOL! In the words of Gladys Knight, “Gotta make the best of a bad situation.” However, they understood a few key points after watching the video which answered their questions and helped me better explain post op protocols to them.
They now know this is going to be major surgery, that I am going to hurt badly for a while and that I will have drainage tubes inserted in my body when I get home to collect any fluids so that I don’t get an infection. I wanted them to be aware of all of this because up until now, establishing boundaries around my body, particularly my breasts has been quite impossible. Up until my surgery, my boobs will have covered a solid quarter of my body mass. When my children hug me when I am sitting down, they are unintentionally hugging my boobs. When they are on my lap, they are sitting on my boobs. When they run up to me to put their arms around my waist, they run into my boobs (which hang below my waist). It’s hard to say “Don’t touch my boobs” without preventing them from touching me altogether. They can’t put their head on my tummy or even on my side without my boobs getting in the way. The damned things are everywhere.
After surgery, it’s going to be very precarious as they have gotten used to me out of futility allowing them access to my boobs. They can’t be smooshing up against me to be lovey-dovey when I get home from surgery. As much as they will want to be of comfort to me, I had to find a way to help them understand why touching will be off limits for a little while. They needed to see that video to understand what pain I will be in and why they can’t be all over me. For a few days at least, my body will be a no-hug zone. They will also need to be good for their dad and grandmother as well as quiet when in the house, so I can rest.
I sense that while gross, they got the message. Even though they didn’t enjoy it, they aren’t so confused now about what I am doing or even talking about and what is going to happen to me next month. They know, and they know nearly as well as a physician what is to come.
Sometimes homeschooling and raising children in a respectful way can be kind of creepy. Sometimes parenting children in an honest household means telling them things that recent generations sheltered their kids from. However, in the end, I believe my kids will find their own ways of handling the realities they are facing if they are told the truth. And we are here to help them understand how things work in the world and to either answer any questions they may have or help them find the best answers along the way.
One thing is for sure, we are all glad that lesson is out of the way.
Onward and upward to day 33!